Judgement has saturated our lives and spoiled our ability to kindly connect with each other and ourselves. I’m amazed at how quickly it activates, always on the heels of observation, with bias following closely behind.
Observation: I completed two days of heart health exercise this week instead of three.
Judgement: I’m slipping on commitment to my heart health.
Bias: I’m bad at exercising.
Observation: That woman had cosmetic plastic surgery.
Judgement: That woman has low self-esteem.
Bias: Women spend too much time caring what others think of them.
Observation: That person attended a Donal Trump rally.
Judgement: That person must be stupid.
Bias: People who think Trump would be a good POTUS are absolute idiots.
Observation: That person got their Master’s Degree in Social Work.
Judgement: It’s so naive to think you can change the world.
Bias: Liberals waste their time tending to their bleeding hearts.
Sure, there’s an appropriate time and place for judgement—like in a court room. But mostly the judgement I hear and see on a daily basis serves no positive purpose. News reports are usually accompanied by judgement, the nature of the opinion depends on what channel you’re watching. Talk shows are full of it. “Reality” shows are open range for viewers to spew their judgement at pregnant teens, hoarders, and famous families.
“Sometimes it’s fun to judge!” I hear you shouting at your screen, or maybe only in your head. I’m tempted to judge that statement, ‘cause that’s how the vicious downward spiral of judging goes. Did you notice the judgmental tone of even that last sentence? See, it seems there’s no escaping it!
But there is.
We can practice letting go of judgement. We can ask ourselves, “Is this an observation or a judgement?” When we let go of judgement we make space for acceptance. When we stop judging others, our fear of others judging us dissipates.
Let’s all give ourselves the gift of kindness. And once we feel we have enough, we can share with the rest of the world.